Friday, August 27, 2010

Missing in Action

I have to apologize for my severe neglect of this blog lately. But as you can imagine, my hands were full with projects which we shall file under “Miscellaneous”. Besides, I am quite sure you would not be the least bit entertained by the events that occurred in recent weeks. I’ll give you the abridged version:

Pack a box, wait in line to get paperwork signed, cry, goodbye party, pack a box, wait in line to get paperwork signed, cry, goodbye dinner, pack a box…

There were some funny moments, some sad ones and some brilliant realizations tucked in between.

My emotions have been all over the place these past two weeks. I promised my husband between the anxiety attacks, spells of utter elation and crying jags that I’d find his sane wife and return her promptly. To date she has not yet been located. If you see her, please notify the authorities immediately.

If I get nothing more out of this move, I have learned so much about myself in the process. I have learned that I can. I can run into a brick wall, wipe away my tears, brush myself off and keep on going. I can fit all 20 pairs of shoes into my suitcase. I can live without sleep. I can be uncompromising. I can laugh at my mistakes. I can feel scared. I can be uncertain and completely sure all at the same time. I can get things done when no one else can.

I have also learned DH is the most patient man in the world.

With only 5 days left, the stress level has been strangely reduced to a trickle and replaced by waves of anticipation for the impending adventure. But check back with me while I am sprinting through LaGuardia to JFK with 6 extra-large and overpacked suitcases, a pissed off puppy and a frazzled husband…

Bring on the life boats.

Friday, August 6, 2010

A Picture's Worth: In Search of a Home

Whilst in search of a proper living space in Israel via this magnificent creature called the inter-webz, I have become quite amused by one example of the seemingly universal Israeli I couldn't give a rat's ass attitude.

Throughout my quest I have observed Israelis lack the staging a home method of their American counterparts. As a twenty-something, never quite ready to purchase a home, I've done my fair share of apartment hunting in the States. Perfectly photoshopped, cropped and propped apartments almost gleam from the home pages. The masterfully manicured apartment complex with an equally manicured name, like Summer Oaks or The Estates at Stone Creek, entice you to come live the dream. Beautiful model homes with Martha Stewart kitchens and Pottery Barn bedrooms allow you to take a brief moment to imagine your flawless life in your flawless home.

Israelis, on the other hand, are a bit more...understated. Their apartments are named “2 room/small but good enough/no pets allowed”. Two scenarios usually occur in search of an apartment in Israel:  either one will come across photos of the resident’s belongings strewn across their apartments or the apartment is still under construction with bare light bulbs hanging from the ceiling, a broom tucked into the corner and half- hung cabinets lying on the dusty floor.

I have seen condoms sitting on a bathroom counter, dogs sleeping in unmade beds, a family enjoying dinner in the unkempt dining room and piles of dirty dishes in the kitchen sink. If you are a Nosey Ned at heart, then apartment hunting in Israel is the perfect place to get your rocks off.

My favorite is the amount of obscene photos I have unearthed. One apartment was perfect...minus the sofa-sized poster of a woman's bare chest hanging above the living room couch. And I found another gorgeous 2 room townhome in a great location featuring a perfectly nice photo of a dog in mid-poop in the backyard.